No one ever said that life was fair or equal for anyone. It is definitely not fair to those who have been in someway abused or neglected as a child. Children deserve to grow up happy and secure. Unfortunately that is often not the case. Many grow up hungry, abused, neglected, unwanted, etc.
In order for you to move past this hurt, pain, and shame, you need to love yourself and realize that you DID NOT deserve whatever was done to you. You DID NOT cause the situation. What you deserved was to be loved, respected, and to feel secure and happy. Once you realize and recognize this, you are a step closer to accepting what happened to you and learning to deal with it. It is simply something that you lived through or survived in many cases.
You need to love yourself enough to forgive the offender. Oh, you are not forgiving them for their sake, nor does it mean that you condone what they did. Forgiveness is for you, so that your life is no longer poisoned by the event(s) that took place. As long as you harbor the pain and resentment, you will stay "stuck" in that place of hurt and pain. The same place you felt as a child that was dark and scary. That child still lives in you and you need to embrace that child and love that child and tell that child that it was NOT their fault. Hug that child. No, I don't think that is strange at all. I hugged myself while I was walking through my own issues. I was alone in the shower, crying and letting the pain come flowing out. It will help you heal.
One good way to get things out and to recognize them is to start writing. Write down every single thought that comes to your mind. Write down how you felt, what you felt, etc. Keep writing until your mind is completely blank and everything is down on that paper and out of you. Now, breath, slow deep breaths. Relax. Now, throw the paper in the trash or burn it. Its done. Its gone now.
As you become more comfortable with realizing that it was not your fault and that you should NOT be ashamed, you will feel freer to share your story with others. This is another way of letting things out and for the healing to begin. You will be surprised by the number of people who have been through the same or similar situations. Again, you are not alone in your fight.
Sharing your story will also help others to overcome their own fears and difficulties. We are all human and we all have pain and hurt. We also have the option to forgive and to move on with our lives.
God loves every single one of us. EVERYONE of us. Many go through trials or situations so that they can help others. Helping others and loving others is really what life is all about. You can help change the future by loving yourself, sharing your story, and helping others.